I have worked with a number of highly successful people over the years. They have all what we call success; money, nice houses, cars, stuff…
Yet, many of them have a nagging feeling of some kind of failure; that their success is more a cover up for who they really are. For years they have pushed away their own dreams and wants, for fulfilling dreams and wants from others.
Many of them are balancing on the edge to Burn Out, but they would never allow that thought to appear. It is too frightening! And for them, it’s not fun anymore! Their success has become toxic, feeling trapped on the treadmill. The success is driving them, instead of them driving their success! Feelings of failure, sadness, anger, bad conscious, and shame are constantly present.
What to do when your life is running on auto pilot?
1. Make a business appointment with yourself! Mark a date in your calendar and block out undisturbed time. Plan at least 2-4 hours, make it a full day if you can, so block out as long as you feel you want the meeting to be. Prepare an agenda for the meeting. Include at least 4-5 points including;
2. Decide your intention At the date and time, start with setting your intention for the time you will spend and what you want to accomplish, and how you want to feel during the meeting.
One intention could be; “within the next two hours I will have a plan for how to have more time doing only things I like” or “I have 4 hours undisturbed time and I my intention is to become clear in what I really want”. You may have a the luxury of a full day, so you decide to focus on what makes your life meaningful. You may focus only on things that bring happiness into your life, and how you can get more of that. Or, you may just want to sit quiet with the only intention to let your thoughts flow, without deciding on a focus. There is no right or wrong for your intentions, the main intention is that you have quiet, undisturbed time with yourself.
3. Face Reality First of all, make a decision to be honest and open with yourself. What are the feelings and thoughts that pop up? Just notice, don’t go into a story about it, just let thoughts, images and feelings, come, and go.
If you feel this is difficult, write a letter to yourself where you describe what you feel, and think, what is bothering you and how you feel your life is, right now.
When you feel you are ready with the floating though exercise, take an empty paper and make a T-bar. Listing all what is working in your life on the left side, and all what is not working on the right side. Continue until you think you have covered everything, all parts that are active, and also not active.
4. Analyze where you spend your time Make a circle and draw lines from the centre to form pieces of a cake. That makes up 100%. The circle represents you. Each piece is one of the following areas;
Make your pieces as big as you feel the importance it has in your life. You may find that Career, Money and Family have the biggest portions. Maybe your Personal Growth and Fun are fairly small. And Romance almost non existing? Get as honest and close to reality as possible. This will help you to find out where the flip is. Tips: if you prefer you can make a diagram, or illustrate the different portions in any way you want, as long as you get a clear insight on what’s you’re spending your time and energy on.
5. Know what you want In fact, most people don’t know what they want! They are so trapped in the daily routines and duties so they have stopped dreaming a long time ago. When asked the question: “What do you really want?” they can’t answer. Their inner, critical voice is asking: “Who do you think you are?”, “Why aren’t you satisfied with what you have?” or “Why should you have more free time/more money/ better job/ happier life… than anybody else?”.
Why not? Is there a reason that you shouldn’t live the life you’d like to live? The job that makes you thrive? This step is essential so grab your pen and paper, and start listing what it is you want!
6. Create a colourful vision If money didn’t matter, how would your life and work look like? Sound like? Feel like?If all the obstacles were not there, how would your life be different? Create your vision and think really big! No limits allowed! Make your vision as vivid and colourful as you can. Include your five senses. What do you see? What do you hear? Smell of fresh flowers, the sea? How do you feel? What is the touching feeling? Start dreaming, and make it attractive, alive and juicy!
7. Take action! What is the first, easy, step you can take today, that will bring you closer to your vision? One step and today!
Then, make an inspired action list over things you will want do, and think of what you would gain by implementing or changing your actual situation. Make a long term action plan, and get going!
Bonus Tips: Revisit your vision and inspired action list every day. Take a few minutes every morning before you leave for work. Reconnect to your feelings and how wonderful your life will be when your vision becomes real. Make it as if it already had happened. This is your vision! Review your inspired action list and set your intention for the day.
Congratulations! You’ve had a business meeting; you have a vision and a plan to reach where you want to go!
This is an excerpt for the course program “Eliminate Burnout and Ignite Your Career”. Learn how to stay in your own integrity, make and keep agreements, free up your energy and use on things and activities that inspires you. Go to www.IgniteYourCareer.com and join the Tele seminar series “Eliminate Burnout and Ignite Your Career”.